Warning: This post is practically drowning in history. But, it’s freaking cool history. So try to wait it out and leave the stones marked “nerd” on the ground. Mmmmkay?
So, imagine yourself in a restored saloon-type room listening to the hilarious Ed from the Underground Tour give you a briefing on the beginnings of Seattle. (Even if you don’t read this entire post, check out their website, it is pretty cool.)
In 1889 Seattle was a booming logging town with logs coming down the hill from the forest to the dock so quickly the street was nicknamed Skid Row. (Seriously. I can’t make this stuff up.) At any rate, with all that lumber, the buildings made of wood, blah blah blah, one little fire in a carpenter’s shop covered in sawdust, located beneath a paint store and next to an armory chock full of gunpowder and TNT…well, the fire burned down the entire town in twelve hours.
As a result the city was rebuilt with stone, the fire department was expanded, and the urban planning commission decided to raise the streets by twenty feet to make room for running water and sewage pipes. However, raising the streets of an entire city takes time, and the boomtown of Seattle didn’t have time to wait. So they rebuilt the buildings with the knowledge that the first-floor would eventually be the basement. The city started building retaining walls where modern-day curbs would be–between the sidewalk and the street–and eventually the lower sidewalks were covered with new sidewalks and the underground city was out of sight, out of mind. There are stairs leading down to basement shops all over Pioneer Square, and clouded skylights in the sidewalk that were designed to let light until the sidewalks below. Most people walking down the street assume those skylights are decorative tiling or something, the purplish glass is quite pretty and the basement-level shops were simply extra real estate. Not entirely true, there is a whole city down there. Granted, an abandoned, dusty, half-forgotten city, but it’s awesome.
Those windows used to look onto the street, now they look onto a retaining wall that holds up Yesler Way. The sidewalk leads half-way around the block and into the basement of another building.
That doorway is a door that now leads to somewhere under the street. Is anyone else fascinated by this stuff?
On the left, retaining wall tons of sawdust, gravel, and general “street raising stuff”. On the right is a building. Walking down a sidewalk, right underneath the current sidewalk.
Want to walk into a creepy underground building? Watch Your Step, and Please Enter Here.
After the streets were raised and the old sidewalks covered with new sidewalks, many merchants used their now-basements as warehouses or something. This one has painted words on the walls for grain, potatoes, and such. There are also signs for old hotels, restaurants, and banks along with artifacts and all sorts of creepy, dusty old stuff. Hey, there is even a legend of a haunted bank vault complete with ghostly woman who was killed a couple of hundred years ago.
After an hour underground with cold, concrete walls and puddles on the floor I was ready to head upstairs and get a cup of Hot Chocolate at the Elliott Bay Book Company; dude, Underground Tours are awesome–but they are also quite chilly. Just sayin’. Um, I think I could spend all day in Elliott Bay Book…wandering around and just staring at the stairs and shelves and little nooks and crannies. It is book lover’s paradise. Tragically, my camera was out of batteries, which means that the Internets will not see any potential evidence of my hugging the shelves and kissing the books and generally making a fool of myself. Not that I would ever admit to that kind of blatant bibliophilia in public. Cough.
It is a well-documented fact, at least on this blog, that I have a major slight obsession with Dale Chihuly and his hand-blown glass. Last time I went to Seattle I was so excited to find some of Chihuly’s work in a mall, of all places. This time it was in the lobby of the Sheraton Hotel, and I was thrilled to something new and familiar, all at the same time, see Exhibit A.
Do these floraly pieces remind anyone else of hats or light poles or something imported directly from Whoville? Anyone? Part of the reason that I love the city of Chicago is because of all the sculptures on the street, in public parks, just laying around the city waiting for people to love them. I know that my own city has it’s share of street sculpture, but I love discovering it in other places.
Exhibit B, a ginormous, fantastically Dr. Seussian tube-thing. And the color? Delicious. Suddenly I am craving an interesting orange coat, or scarf, or both–clearly not to be worn at the same time–and a chocolate orange.
Ok, so Dr. Seussian art makes me crave brightly colored clothing, hanging around Totem Poles somehow leads to my making funny faces.
Ok, all joking aside, the Totem Poles are quite impressive. Thankfully, this one wasn’t pilfered from Alaska on some Klondike Gold Rush expedition. It was carved about 35 years ago in Seattle and has been living near the Space Needle ever since.
Impressive, no?
The Space Needle is located in a fantastic park full of all sorts of sculpture and interesting architecture. Would you believe that this is a museum and that hole in the bottom right of the photo is large enough for a train to pass through? Yeah. Awesome.
“Chief Seattle”, in all his bronzed glory. Pioneer Square, the historical district of Seattle, is full of beautiful old buildings and bronzed Native American Chiefs. Ok, only one. And he is the city’s namesake…sort of. See, in Native American tradition speaking the name of someone who is dead will make their soul return from the hunting ground in the sky, or make their body roll over in their grave, or something quite unpleasant like that. At any rate, so when Chief Sealth was approached about having the city named after him, he requested they not choose his given name and call the city Seattle instead. The Head Honcho’s of the time agreed and the logging town of Duwamps was renamed–thank heavens!–and Seattle was born.
This is actually one of my favorite photos from my trip. It is so urban decay-meets-graphic colors with a shot of historical intrigue. I’ll tell you where this photo was taken in my next post, all about the secret rooms and walkways twenty feet below Seattle’s streets (and by “secret” I mean “forgotten”).
Once upon a time, there was a girl named heidikins, who–for the most part–was punctual and relatively unflustered to the casual observer…except when she wasn’t…
I have only been late for a date a handful of times; and I have only been late for a first date once. A few days prior to my tardiness I met a charming guy, gave him my number when he asked for it, and was pleasantly surprised when he called and asked me out to lunch. At the time, I wasn’t staying at my apartment, and this charming man had insisted on picking me up at home. Ok. Fine. I can meet the guy at home, I have plenty of time. Only, I had to change my outfit, twice. And I was 30 minutes from my apartment. And I was a little bit nervous–which doesn’t happen all that often-slash-ever.
Sitting at lunch in a little Italian cafe I quickly discovered I didn’t really need to be nervous. Despite being ridiculously good looking, my date was kind, easy to talk to, funny and completely adorable. We sat and chatted for almost two hours and discovered we had a lot of experiences in common, he laughed at my jokes, and–at least for me–I kept trying to convince myself that I wasn’t as smitten as I truly felt. After all, I had just met this guy!
Well, here we are, ten thousand kisses, a hundred dates, a couple of vacations and a year later…we still are finding ideas and goals we have in common, we still can talk for hours, find humor in just about every situation and I am undeniably smitten. Handsome is, without a doubt, the most amazing man I have ever met and every day I am a little more in love with him. I still get butterflies when he holds my hand, I catch my breath when he kisses me. I love to fall asleep snuggled up on his chest and, even more, I love to wake up and find myself in his arms. I love that he will make me waffles for dinner (with homemade syrup), slow dances with me, worries about me, cuddles me, loves me. I get twitterpated when he calls me “My Love”, or “My Blonde One”, and I can’t help but smile every time he calls me by any one of a half-dozen other pet names.
I could go on and on about what a fantastic boyfriend I am lucky enough to have found, but I don’t want you to throw up on your screen. In your world it is just another Thursday, but my world today is something a little more. Today I have a lunch date to a little Italian cafe with the love of my life.
…And they lived happily.
I have never really been the blood and guts and cadaver type. Despite the fact that I am related to people who are ok with it, and despite the fact that I have seen a couple of episodes of E.R. and Grey’s Anatomy. Really, the whole idea of seeing muscles or open wounds or anything like that makes me a bit queasy. Or a lot queasy. When I first heard about “Body World“, the science-based exhibit of real-but-plasticized body parts I kind of threw up a little in my mouth. Body parts? Real ones, right in front of me? Ewww!
All that queasiness and girlishness aside, Handsome convinced me that it would be awesome and promised that if I got squeamish we could leave. Last week I braved the idea of body parts–real body parts–and dutifully showed up at The Leonardo at the Salt Lake Library.
The body parts, they were everywhere. Real ones, real ones with artificial parts, arms, legs, veins, nerves, bones, muscles…the works. I was fascinated. Absolutely fascinated. I never knew that livers were that large, and I didn’t know that internal organs were that squooshed together and I had absolutely no idea that non-pregnant uteruses (uteri?) were that small. Not only did the exhibit have individual organs, but there were entire bone and muscle bodies posed so you could see all the different parts. FASCINATING!
I could go on and on about the different systems, the different process, the different parts…but I won’t. I realize that for some of you it is pre-lunch and you may not be all excited about blood and guts and such. If you’re here, I highly suggest you go see the Body World exhibit. If you aren’t here, when the tour hits your city, show up.
That being said…there was something less than awesome about the exhibit. Towards the end of our wander through the Leonardo, around all the exhibits, stepping around the dozen or so sketch artists expanding their portfolios, I was hit smack-dab with a full frontal male art model. Not a striking anatomically correct mannequin, but a real-life (read, living, breathing, chatting), saggy, middle aged, man with a mop of curly hair and a pair of Tevas. Oh. My. Laws. It was terrifying. And it didn’t go away! For some reason I thought that prior to allowing unsuspecting patrons to wander into a nudey, arty….thing I would have to sign some kind of form, or document, or something. In San FranciscoI’d expect a naked man lounging around in public, but not in Salt Lake City. Ugh. It was horrifying! However, at least the middle-aged nekid man was waxed. Say wha? Waxed? Really?
I wax. Some of you wax. But a middle-aged man waxed from back to belly button? Um…yikes! Wow! Yikes! I really don’t know how to respond to this, other than the absolute embarrassment combined with mortification and horrific curiosity. And perhaps a semi-serious case of the giggles. What can I say? I guess I’m really just a quasi-freak. Although really, what would you have done? It’s not like he was tucked in the corner somewhere discreet…the man was standing in the freaking middle of the room, well lit and surrounded by people. People who kept saying things like “Would you please arch your back a little more”, and “Put your left foot up on that step”, and other horribly descriptive phrases. You couldn’t help but notice.
I have done a quick check, and the nekid man is not always at the exhibit. So, buy your tickets early, do not eat chicken before you visit, (human muscles and tendons have a striking resemblance to raw chicken…I’m just sayin’), and prepare to be fascinated.
Filed under: All the World's a Stage..., Handsome V, There and Back Again, Utah: Life Elevated
It is a fairly commonly-known fact that I love going to see plays, particularly the really good kind. I’m talking Broadway-caliber actors vs. community theatre. Don’t get me wrong, I love community theatre–I just REALLY love professional theatre. In fact, I took a trip to New York City just to see six Broadway shows, and a trip to Chicago simply to see Wicked…and the King Tut exhibit. And spent a weekend in San Francisco to see Legally Blonde: The Musical. What can I say, I’m a nerd and a geek and a dork, all rolled up and perched atop a pair of fabulous heels.
At any rate, the Tuacahn Theatre, previously mentioned for producing High School Musical–which I have now seen–was one of only a handful of off-Broadway theatres to acquire the rights to perform Les Miserable. And I, for one, was not about to miss it.
The Tuacahn Theatre(TWO-uh-KAHN, means “Canyon of the Gods”) is an outdoor amphitheatre set in a box canyon of gorgeous red-rock in Southern Utah. This weekend, Handsome & I packed into his super-shiny-and-fast “fun car” and headed south. Four hours south. Yes, I convinced him to drive 8 hours round-trip to see a musical.
And get a burger at In-n-Out. He didn’t complain. Once. Hi In-n-Out! I miss you! Don’t forget about me! I’ll be back soon, ok?
I somehow convinced… Handsome and I decided to head over to the theatre during the afternoon to pick up our tickets to the completely sold out performance, and also take a few pictures for blogumentation purposes.
This is such an amazing place! I was floored at how big the red-rock backdrop made everything seem. Those cliffs are probably 400-ish feet tall, the looming backdrop is absolutely stunning. You can see where the live orchestra sits, and the lights and speakers and everything. I wondered, if I was this impressed already, how would the actual show measure up?
It was AMAZING! I haven’t seen Les Mis in several years, and I forgot how much I loved the story, the music, the emotion…I may or may not have sobbed half-a-dozen times. (That was a first…and a surprise. A good surprise.) I actually went to school with a couple of the actors and it was kind of surreal to hear them singing in such a, such a BIG thing. Granted, this theatre couldn’t reproduce the turning-circle stage the origina Les Mis uses, but I didn’t even notice. Do you want to know why?
Because they had ponies. Live ponies. On stage, pulling around carts of prisoners, soldiers, townspeople, stuff…ponies, people. On stage. I got such a rush of butterflies when the first team pulled out the prisoners at the beginning…ponies! I was sold. Throughout the rest of the performance there were a few other key additions that could never have been accomplished on a normal stage. Specifically, fireworks. Yes. Real fireworks. Shot off from the canyon wall during the French Revolution/barricade scene. Fireworks! And cannons! And more ponies! (Note to PETA: no ponies were harmed in the production of this event.)
I could actually go on and on about the ponies and the fireworks and more ponies. But I won’t. Because I’m already a little embarrassed that I am still so excited about them. Thank you Handsome, for putting up with my pony-loving ways…and driving 8 hours so I could see ponies in a play the greatest musical of all time.
Let’s take a little break, shall we?
How about we take stock of 2008. I realize it’s not the end of the year, the traditional time for “taking stock”, but I feel like an era is finally over. The Sucky Part of 2008 era. It’s been on the out for a couple of weeks, but I feel like it has officially ended. And because I am In Charge, I say that SP08 is done. D-U-N, done. Over. [insert synonym for "done" here.]
I don’t necessarily want to get into the details (again) about the Sucky Part of 2008–SP08, if you will–but I do want to tell you that from this point until the New Year will be classified as the Awesome Part of 2008. I don’t have specifics yet as to what, exactly, will constitute AP08, but here are a few highlights.
Halloween: I love Halloween. I am trying to decide what I should be for Halloween, I have narrowed it down to three choices, your input would be appreciated. Goldilocks, Little Red Riding Hood, or Marilyn Monroe. Clearly, this will be another post for another day with pictures and details and such – but please think about it and voice your opinions.
Thanksgiving Dinner 1: This will be traditional turkey and cranberry sauce. Siblings are invited, pie will be consumed, it should be great.
Handsome & I will be celebrating our 1-year of dating anniversary in November. Oh. My. Laws. One whole year, remember when I introduced him to the blogosphere? Yeah, he is still that dreamy.
Thanksgiving Dinner 2: This will be on Thanksgiving Day, with my mom and my sister, and will consist of homemade Cafe Rio. I am so excited.
Lurch and Glinda will be getting hitched, I am excited for my dad and his fabulous fiance to get hitched. I am not excited for my x-boyfriend to be my cousin. Blech.
Thanksgiving Dinner 3: Salmon and whatever else goes with salmon. I’m excited.
Gingerbreadmania!! What should I make this year? I am seriously thinking of scaling down and redoing the ginger-cathedral from last year…the one that didn’t happen. Thoughts?
Christmas: Lights, trees (yes, there will be two trees), presents, wrapping paper, hot chocolate and fireplaces and choo-choo-trains and….I could go on and on, I love Christmas. And I’ve never been excited for Christmas this early in the year. Usually I am all Bah Humbugy until the week of the actual festivities…but this year, for whatever reason, I am stoked.
Christmas Dinner: I’m sure there will be multiples of these as well, with lots of goodies and lots of laughing about crazy families.
…And that is all happening in the next 10 weeks. Ten weeks, people. AP08 will be condensed into 10 weeks of Awesomeness. And then it will 2009. Two-thousand-nine. I’m actually getting all giggly-excited just thinking about it.
So, the questions: I need your opinion on Halloween costumes and gingerbread construction. Please discuss.
When in Hawai’i, it is only natural to hang out on the beach. Right? Now, I am naturally albinoand have strict instructions from my dermatologist to never, ever, ever, EVER get sunburned. In fact–says he–it would be better if I didn’t even get the teensiest bit of a tan line, what with my Melanoma genes and previous cancer scares and all. When venturing to a tropical island, this makes life a wee bit trickier. I had to be very careful about my skin, slathering on sunscreen to walk down the street, bathing in it before heading to the beach. I even bought one of those surf-shirt do-thingies to prevent tan lines on my back. These kind of precautions preclude the fabulous laying out on the beach look. Yeah, I was the nerd hanging out under an umbrella reading Steinbeck with all my limbs covered by various pieces of clothing and towels. Sometimes I really think I should move to Ireland or Nova Scotia or someplace where tanning is generally frowned upon. (Is tanning frowned on in Nova Scotia or Ireland? I don’t know, please help.)
At any rate, being on an island and all, beaches were to be enjoyed. So I kept applying sunscreen and kept my camera handy.
This is the snorkeling “beach” in Puako (POO-uh-ko), just a short walk from our condo. There were turtles in the shallow tide pools every single time I wandered down there, not to mention crabs, fishies, anemones (and scary sea urchins, hello stingers!), and one time there was even a seal. Hello, Nature! My only problem with this beach was the fact that one of those harmless-looking rocks sliced my toe open, and it continued to throb for a solid week. (Soaking it in salt water probably didn’t help.)
I don’t know what happened here. These people were hanging out on Hapuna Beach (Huh-POO-na)–the one gorgeous powder sand beach we visited–and all of a sudden I found this Handsome character buried from toe to chin in sand. Honestly, I don’t know what happened. (Please ignore the heidikins pictured above who is covered in suspicious sand. And forgive the funky neck, by the time this pic had been taken he had sand in unimaginable crevices and had his head propped up for ages.)
Lava beach. More lava. Not so much a “lounge and relax” type of beach, more of a come, see, point-and-shoot, enjoy, go home. But it does make for a beautiful sunset.
There are only a few black sand beaches in the world, and I doubt any are more difficult to get to than this one. Approximately a mile-long switch-back road with a twenty-five percent grade (TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT!), potholes and rusty cars that had slipped off the road. Crazy, I tell you. But the beach? The beach was one of the most gorgeous things I have ever seen. White surf, black sand, gorgeous blue sky.
Waipio Valley (WHY-pee-oh) is a narrow slice of a valley with incredibly steep sides and no amenities. Meaning, the taro root farmers don’t have electricity, or running water. The only people who live there are bonafide hippies and wander-hearts, but even I–with my high maintenance closet and fear of Big Bugs–would consider leaving civilization, at least temporarily, to have this beach as part of my backyard.
When I think about the most beautiful places I have been, the most incredible views I have seen, this will always be among my favorites. And for the record, I am consistently amazed at how well my little 3.5 mega-pixel point-and-shoot Canon camera did on this trip. When I grow up, and I certainly hope it is sometime soon, I will have a real-life SLR camera. Swoon!
In case you were unaware, the state of Hawai’i was formed by volcanoes. Molten lava and white-hot flame volcanoes. Eruptions and Explosions and Mouth of Hell volcanoes. I was aware of this fact, and I think I remember hearing about eruptions happening every so often. But Hawai’i is a long way away from little old, volcano-less, Salt Lake City, and it didn’t really register in my flurry to get ready for my trip that the Big Island still has active volcanic activity. All the time. Molten lava and white-hot flame volcanic activity. Eruptions and “Hello Hell, Nice to see you this time of year” volcanic activity. Crazy. As M. and J. (Handsome’s sister and her hubby-slash-Big Island Tour Guides Extraordinaire) were talking about the last time they visited, they described seeing lava like this–do you see those people up there on top? Yeah, in Hawai’i they aren’t so particular about personal injury law suits, if you step in flaming lava you deserve to have a peg-leg the rest of your life. It’s hot, stay away from it!
M. & J. talked about walking right up to lava like this, no restrictions, no lava police, just raw, liquid awesomeness. 
Sadly, there was no lava actually flowing the day we visited the volcano. Apparently the previous day Muana Loa (MOO-ana LOW-uh, yes, a pronunciation lesson is forthcoming) was all sorts of upset, shooting lava and fiery sparks all over the place. However, the day we went she was mostly quiet. There was a lot of crazy-insane volcanic sulphur-steam coming out of the crater, and cracks in the ground, and holes in the hardened lava, but no molten lava. However, I still felt like I was in some sci-fi movie, or an “end of the world” type situation, or some equally bizarre landscape. But no, I was in the U-S-of-A.
Or, maybe I was on the set for the Land Before Time XVII…
I was so completely amazed by the Volcano Park, I don’t think I’ve ever encountered such ancient-but-somehow-still-raw nature in my life. The sense of “holy crap, I’m completely insignificant and powerless against this type of nature” was everywhere; awesome, scary, and destructively-beautiful all at the same time.
I’m sure you love my annotated photos. I just wanted to let you know that I’m handy when it comes to Paint.
Awwww…Handsome and heidikins, with the Mouth of Hell in the background. Ahem.
Have you ever had one of those unplanned, completely spontaneous, certifiably crazy adventures that, upon reflections, your only thought is something along the lines of “Daaaaang. Now THAT was cool!” Yes? No? Of course, happens all the time? Ok, good. So we have various levels of spontaneously adventurous. M. & J. (who, it should be mentioned, absolutely made this trip happen. Danke mucho!) have a Big Island Adventure Bible that has been flipped through, dog-eared, and carried on several trips to Hawai’i. Some of the listed adventures didn’t really work out so well–that “rough, 4-Wheel Drive ONLY road” description should really have read “you should probably charter a helicopter to drop you off”–but some were certifiably crazy.
Somewhere on the road between Hilo and the Volcano there is a mostly hidden lava tube. What is a lava tube? Well, kids, a lava tube is an underground (or underwater) cave that was once filled with molten lava making it’s way from the belly of the volcano to the Big Outside World beyond. What was once an underground river of fiery red fury is now a long, tubey-cave of with rock ledges, hardened lava rope, and even the beginnings of lava stalactites (those are the ones that hang from the ceiling). So, in the Hawai’i Adventure Bible there is a small, easily skipped-over paragraph about a mostly hidden lava tube. Seriously, the directions on how to find it go something like this:
On Highway 11, across the street from mile marker 23 and 80 yards from the road is the entrance to the lava tube. The main trail is about 30 feet to the right (west) of a gravel driveway. The book says it is exactly 80 yards from the road. The main trail is about 30 feet to the right (west) of a gravel driveway. Follow that trail. You will hear lots of barking dogs, but don’t worry, they are chained up. You will probably have to crawl through bushes on your stomach and you will have your legs scratched off by branches, but follow this “trail” for 80 yards and you will find the opening of a lava tube. Make sure to bring flashlights and wear shoes that are not flip-flops or you’ll scratch your feet to pieces–lava tubes are full of loose rocks.
Um, that’s crazy. And that’s exactly what we did, pulling over at the gravel driveway, sprinting across the highway, crawling through this crazy-tiny “trail”, praying the scary-sounding dogs were really on chains, or fences, or something…and lo, and behold, the Bible was correct. Lava tube. Mostly hidden. Totally awesome.
…Only we forgot the camera. So, you’ll just have to deal with googled images, and just know that this tube was infitintely cooler than the more-famous Thurston Lava Tube in the Volcano Park (see below), and without the “this is discovered, it’s traveled, it’s well-lit” aspect. Our tube was can’t-see-your-hand-in-front-of-your-face dark. We had to pick our way across loose rock that has not been touched in who-knows how many millions of years. We only survived because we dragged a couple of scuba dive lights through the brush. In short, our lava tube (and yes, I will refer to it as “our lava tube”, was superior to every other lava tube on the island, and possibly in the world. That’s right, I said it. I double-dog-dare you to prove me wrong.
Our tube was about 20 feet wide and 20 feet tall and stretched for about a mile and a half, and our tube was chock-full of lava tracks and pieces of hardnened stone. In some places the rock was reddish, in some places it was shiny and reflective. Sometimes the rock was smooth and sinewy, sometimes it was pokey and treacherous, and sometimes it was pebbly and almost gravel-like. It was FASCINATING! Ever since my Timpanogos Cave adventure, I have been thinking a lot more about caves…and this? This was the awesomest cave EVER! I think part of the appeal was that it was so hidden, no plaques, no electricity (flashlights, heavy-duty ones, are essential) no tour-guide. I actually get goosebumps just thinking about it. This was perhaps the most amazing thing that we did while on the Big Island.
(Um…it should be noted that I take no responsibility for any changes to the landscape inbetween your visit to Hawaii and my visit to Hawaii, directions are approximate…if you are planning on taking a trip to the Big Island, buy this book. It will be the best $15 dollars you’ll spend.)
Aloha! I’m back! I’m still doing laundry and finding sand in previously unknown crevices (note to self: while body surfing is fun, it has it’s sandy downside) and thanking the Desert gods for no humidity. I took a ton of pictures, but I am also waiting for copies from other people, so this “Hawaii Recap” may be a bit of a process.
However, I want you to know that my spontaneous Hawai’i vacation was completely unexpected. I only had a few days to get ready and an enormous To Do List, and I did not manage to squeeze in a few in-depth Google searches of the island. But, it’s Hawaii, right? I’ve been to the O’ahu and Honolulu before, it can’t be that different. It’s beachy and sandy and palm tree-y, right? So I loaded in some extra sunscreen and headed to the Airport with Handsome dreaming of relaxing under the palm trees, shaved ice in hand.
Imagine my surprise when, upon landing in Kona-Kailua to find nothing but black lava rock. For miles. And miles. And miles.
I actually thought we had landed on the wrong island. Where were the palm trees? And the white sandy beaches? I mean, I knew that the Hawai’ian Islands were formed by volcanoes, but I guess I was under the impression that in the last several million years since then some kind of vegetation had taken root.
Don’t worry, the whole island doesn’t look like this, but the bulk of the western side does. We stayed in Puako, a teeny little beach community on the west side, midway between Kona and Hawi with plenty of palm trees, a white sandy beach, and lots of submerged lava rock for some great snorkeling.
However, Hawai’i is not all sandy beaches and palm trees, it is all about diversity. In fact, photos from our day-trips around the island could easily be confused for several, separate vacations.
Here we have the jungle part, lush greenery, gorgeous flowers, and plants with leaves the size of a man. A big man. This was kind of expected.
And then there is the desert part. Seriously, there were cacti. This vista reminded me of home. Granted, the deserts here are surrounding a salt water lake, not surrounded by a salty ocean, and they aren’t humid.
Not twenty minutes later the landscape is completely different, grasslands covered in cows and horses and goats. Aloha, and welcome to South Dakota, or Iowa (thankfully, without a thousand miles of corn)
Eerie and almost science-fiction-like, these lava fields are miles and miles of black, shiny, “new” lava. Some places were covered in lava as recently as 2005, and the finality of these flows is incredible. Sadly, there was no active lava flow the day we visited these fields; there are times when you can actually see red, molten lava a few feet away. Crazy! Honestly? I kind of felt like I was at the absolute end of the earth.
Wait…I thought I was in Hawaii, not Wales. On one of our drives the fog and mist was so thick you could hardly see a thousand feet off of the road. I couldn’t help but think of the United Kingdom and their romantically misty moores.
That, my friends, is a volcano. A volcano that is spewing sulphury steam into the air. I kept looking around for Littlefoot and the rest of the Land Before Time gang. Again, I knew Hawai’i was made from volcanoes, but I definitely didn’t expect to be able to look int the crater of an active, smoking, make-the-air-around-it-hotter-than-hades volcano. A few weeks ago this crater was smoke-less, and then BAM! Massive explosion, a bit of lava spewage, and the crater has been smoking ever since. I couldn’t help but stare at this for hours. Really, it’s not everyday you get to see an active volcano.
Less than 40 minutes from that volcano and we’re back to tropical paradise. Sunny and green with deep blue water on the horizon. At this point, I was half-way through a vacation location identity crisis of sorts. Note to self: next time before jumping on a plane skip mopping the floor and spend a solid hour with Google to prevent so many surprises.
These dramatic cliffs are ancient lava formations that have formed a small, but stunning black sand beach. A far cry from white powder and gentle surf, this was perhaps my favorite place we visited. And the 25% grade, 4-Wheel Drive Only road to access it only freaked me out a little. (Ok, a lot, but the views were totally worth it!)
Clearly, I am not done recounting my Hawai’ian adventures, stay tuned for more stories about hidden beaches and scenic road-trips, the search for the best shaved ice on the island, discovering a mostly secret lava tube and crawling around inside, snorkeling with turtles and tropical fish, watching the tide roll in with a gorgeous sunset and hikes through the jungle. And I’ll also tell you how I sliced my foot open on lava/coral (source still unknown, foot still throbbing), how I managed to not get sunburned, how a certain person was buried from chin to big toe in sand, and how the beach we went to the most is now closed due to shark sitings. (GGGAAAAAAAaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!! Sharks. I hates them.)
I feel like I am going to combust, I need to scribble all over this screen; happy, bubbly, super-excitedness is spewing off the end of my fingers. If you’ll excuse me, I need to wipe off my keyboard.
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There. That's a little better.
...
Ok, I can't take it anymore. I have been sitting here for 25 minutes trying to come up with some creative, witty, literary blurb to announce my Big News. And now you are all probably over-thinking the big news, so I should just cut to the chase and get it over with.
I'M GOING TO HAWAII!!!
ON SATURDAY!!!
AS IN, THIS SATURDAY!!!
[Cue Happy Dance music. Commence Happy Dance. Continue Happy Dance until my feet fall off.]
Handsome & I are spending a week in Kona, on the Big Island of Hawaii; and I found all of this out on Tuesday. Let me repeat that; I found out two days ago that I will be taking a week-long, tropical, beach vacation IN TWO DAYS! Holy Crap, my To-Do List is enormous. I absolutely do not expect you to feel sorry for me for a big To-Do list…but I’m going to share it anyways, and because I have been SLIGHTLY productive in the last two days, some things are already crossed off.
- I need to schedule a wax. This is of utmost importance.
- Update: Must make sure to actually attend scheduled wax.
- I need a pedicure. A week in flip-flops demands a nice, cherry-red pedicure.
- I wish I had time to lose 10 pounds.
- Update: Sigh, I’d rather have key lime pie-cakes.
- I also wish I wasn’t so albino-white…shrug. Not much to do about that (said as I pack four bottles of SPF 1000 sunscreen.)
- I need to find a swimming suit…seriously. Isabel has been talking about her swimsuit-centric European vacation, and the appropriate/inappropriate accompanying wardrobe for weeks. I hardly even have time to order an overnight express suit.
- Update: Thank you Miss Erika! My sister sent me shopping in her closet and I came away with bags of summery clothes that are New To Me. Three cute swimming suits, board shorts, a couple of sundresses, three pairs of CUTE shorts, a few t-shirts, and a necklace for good measure. Twin sisters, and their conveniently similar sizing, are awesome!
- Laundry, the never-ending pile is, well, never-ending.
- Choose outfits that say both “beachy” and “classy” and “carefree.” The only real component I have to work with in my closet RIGHT NOW is “classy”…Somehow I don’t think a cashmere v-neck sweater and pearl earrings are “beach wear.”
- Clearly, I need a whole new wardrobe. Or I need someone to shop for me. Erika, the queen of finding cute stuff for $4.97, will be dressing me for about half of my vacation. Either I need to be able to pull off wearing a swimming suit (Conflict! See “lose 10 pounds” item), or I need more clothes.
- I need to consume about 27 pounds of perishable groceries in the next 2 days. (Conflict! See “lose 10 pounds” item.)
- Books…I need them. Any suggestions?
- I need to remember to kiss Handsome’s face off every single time I see him for making this happen.
Oh my laws…I’m going to Hawaii!! The hellishness that has been Summer 2008 will be replaced with a black sand beach! And lava fields! And the ocean! And tropical fishies! And sunshine! And Handsome there, every single day, holding my hand. And he has promised to slow-dance with me. On the beach. Oh my goodness, I can’t wait.
