Filed under: AwesomeSauce, Bookworm, Favorite Things, Phoenix Booksale, Proof that I'm a Nerd
You guys, I am so excited!! February is almost here and I have been counting down the days for an entire YEAR!
No, it’s not because of Groundhog Day when that Puxatony rodent will decide what the crap is going on with the pathetic excuse for a winter that has been reigning over the Rocky Mountain West…
No, not because of Valentine’s Day…
It’s not because of President’s Day and the accompanying paid Monday holiday…
Or because of Fat Tuesday…
It’s not because some Academy of movie watchers will present awards for all the great films I missed in 2011. (That’s right, of the Best Picture Academy Award nominees I have seen exactly zero. Cinema Culture Fail.)
No, not because of my birthday…(However, I will be turning the big 2-9 in three weeks and until this moment I hadn’t actually thought about it.) (And now I probably will have to think about it…) (Crap.) (How about, I don’t. Does that work for everyone? GREAT!) (Hello, denial, nice to see you.) (Also, nice to see you again, overused parantheticals.)
Nope, it’s not any of those “legitimate” holidays, it is far more exciting than a paid day off or an excuse to gorge yourself on chocolate and sprinkles (see: Valentine’s Day, Fat Tuesday, Birthday, Denial). No, the reason I ma STOKED is because the second weekend of February is The Booksale! The wonderful, legendary Phoenix Booksale.
Are you lost? Confused? New around here? Let me catch you up. (Or you can read posts from the last few years here.) Every year the second weekend in February the VNSA society in Phoenix hosts a huge Used Book Sale; 600,000 books are donated throughout the year, collected from all around the city, organized and carefully arranged in a warehouse. They are stacked up on tables in towering piles and crammed underneath them in crates and boxes quietly waiting for someone to adopt them and take them home. Paperbacks are $1.50 (the price went up a few years ago) and hardbacks are $2-3 dollars a piece and those big, shiny coffee table art books priced around $5-$10. On Saturday morning 100,000 people show up at the Phoenix Fairgrounds, wait for hours in switch-back lines that go for miles and jostle and throw elbows for this or that particular book. There have even been incidents of two or more bibliophiles coming to fisticuffs over one book or another. Despite the fisticuff violence, it is all for a good cause. All the proceeds go towards literacy programs in the greater Phoenix area.
Did you get that? You are helping kids learn how to read! You take home boxes and bags and entire SUITCASES full of books all the while helping finance programs to help kids and English as a Second Language students learn how to read! It’s a win-win-win! Now, your only problem is deciding if you are going to fly or drive (fly Southwest if possible, Phoenix is a hub and they let you check 2 bags–i.e. 100 pounds of books–for free!), and figuring out a place to house all those lovely hardbacks once you get them back home. You have such first world problems!
Now, last year my friend HRH and I had a particularly epic adventure. We slept outside in the parking lot in a sketchy part of Phoenix. We were probably 50th in a line of thousands to get inside the booksale whem the doors opened at 8am. We both scored some amazing finds. I, by myself, came home with 94 new books. Ninety-four! Now, this year HRH cannot come to Phoenix with me, but I have convinced J-Mo to be my parking-lot camping buddy and I guarantee I will again come home victorious from the booksale.
In preparation for all the bookish festivities I am printing out a full spreadsheet of all the books that I own. (Yes, I have such a spreadsheet and it is updated every time I new book makes it’s way across my doorstep. Don’t judge. It’s brilliant.) I’ve been collecting titles from around the blogosphere of the books you all loved and raved about in 2011 (Room, In Zanesville, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, Great House, etc), I’m taking that list and will try to track down those titles. I’ve talked to my older brother, a Phoenix resident, and have secured both a place to stay (and shower! and nap!) AND the camping gear required to comfortably sleep in a parking lot. (Thank you, Brother #1!) I even ordered an eye-mask so I’ll be able to sleep better under the bright lights of the fairgrounds.
You guys, I cannot wait!
Filed under: Lists
Happy Lunar New Year! Okay, okay, let me revise: Happy (slightly belated!) Lunar New Year!
Chinese New Year was on Monday, January 23rd, but instead of blogging I was enjoying the last day of a quick weekend getaway/honeymoon with J-Mo. You’ll forgive me, right? Of course you will. You are super classy like that. To my/our credit, we did go see a very extravagant display of Chinese New Years-y dragons and flowers and what-have-you, so at least my resolutions have appropriate photographic distractions.
If you’ve been around these parts for a while you may recall that I make resolutions at Chinese New Year instead of January 1 New Year. (Can I tell you a secret, I actually compose the list at the beginning of January and then give myself a month or so to try those resolutions out. Anything that doesn’t make the month cut won’t be included in the year-long list.)
Before I bust out my resolutions for the Year of the Dragon, let’s do a quick recap on how I did in the Year of the Rabbit.
The Rabbit List: A Recap
Graduate from UniversityDONE!Pay off student loanDONE!- Plan and take two international vacations …FAIL. but I did visit three new states. Hello, Delaware, Oregon and Montana!
Visit two Utah National ParksDONE! I went to Zion National Park (twice!), Arches National Park, and Bryce Canyon! Add in four more parks–Glacier National Park, Yellowstone, the Grand Tetons, and Independence National Park in Philadelphia–and that shapes up to one fantastic year! National Park Pass: well worth it!Visit the Spiral JettyDONE!- Implement a regular exercise regimen (I expect this won’t happen until after I graduate) …and I didn’t graduate until December, so at least I kept half of this one. Ish.
- Hike Mt. Timpanogos …FAIL. But it was STILL SNOWING in July and the summit was an avalanche zone until August…and then the snow started back up again in September. I can hardly be blamed for Mother Nature’s freakish winter ways of 2011.
Read 30 books…Not exactly, only 18, but I’m counting this anyway.- Photograph, organize and label the rest of my shoes …FAIL. I underestimated the amount of stress and free time my schooling would take, and the premium I’d put on time spent with J-Mo.
Send Christmas cardsDONE! No, they weren’t a fancy-pants photo card, but I hand wrote over 50 cards and mailed them to various family and friends. I consider this a success.
I had hoped for an 80% success rate, and here I am at approximately a 60% success rate. Do I consider 2011 a fail? No. I don’t. In almost every possible way 2011 was the best year of my entire life. So, I am planning to just keep up the momentum for 2012 and let 2011 shortcomings slide.
The Dragon List (2012)
- Implement and stick to a monthly budget
- Try 40 new recipes
- Start a book club
- Read 30 books
- Visit two new countries
- Visit at least two new states
- Visit two previously unvisited National Parks
- Train for and run a 5k
- Hike Mt. Timpanogos
- Send birthday cards to my siblings, in-laws, and all the nieces and nephews
The Action Plan
- Implement and stick to a monthly budget: J-Mo and I are in the process of doing this together. I’m kind of excited, a little terrified, but mostly up for the challenge of pooling and sharing money with a boy. Note: except for my Tightwad Tuesday experiment last year I have never really planned out an exact budget, I just kind of wing it. This is going to be new, probably frustrating, and definitely trickier than my current method, but, I hope, rewarding; both financially and otherwise.
- Try 40 new recipes: I’ve already done three. (This resolution was blatantly picked off of Sarakastic’s list for 2011. So thank you, ma’am!)
- Start a book club: Big plans, I tell you! This is my first big planning project now that all things wedding related are off my plate!
- Read 30 books: Already on book two, only 28 more to go!
- Visit two new countries: J-Mo and I are in the pre-planning stages for a big trip later this year! Eeeep!
- Visit at least two new states: I have my eye on New Mexico, North and South Dakota, or possibly Maine.
- Visit two previously unvisited National Parks: Mt. Rushmore (South Dakota) and Mesa Verde (Colorado but on the way to New Mexico) are at the top of my list. (See how I have plans to complete #6 and #7 at THE SAME TIME! I rule.)
- Train for and run a 5k: I may get J-Mo to do this with me, but I’ve already got my eye on a few races for this spring/summer.
- Hike Mt. Timpanogos: This is the third year this has been on my list. Third time’s the charm, right?
- Send birthday cards to my siblings, in-laws, and all the nieces and nephews: I already have everyone in my Google Calendar with a reminder email notification set for 10 days prior to the event. Now, a little simple math puts the number of cards to be mailed at 38. Challenge: accepted.
Alright Year of the Dragon, bring it! I’m ready!
What about you, how are you doing on your resolutions? Did you make any resolutions? Do you think the whole resolution thing is a crock of malarkey? Or was the whole resolution thing sooooo three weeks ago that even commenting on this post will somehow alter any earned bloggy cool points? Lawsy, I hope not, because if that’s the case my bloggy cool point score is somewhere in the negative numbers.
Hi. Hello. Hey there.
So, I’m married now. In most ways, it is exactly the same. And really, I think that is a good thing. I don’t think that a wedding should drastically change a relationship, nor should that event alter the behavior each party exhibits in that relationship. In fact, any kind of drastic change would really worry me (been there, done that), and at the very least would be a bad omen for the rest of the relationship. Right? So, things are the same. The same kind of wonderful. I love that.
Now, I know you were probably hoping for a pretty, pose-y picture-filled post, and I was hoping to add one more “p” word to that sentence, but, unfortunately, neither of us will get exactly what we want. I won’t get pics back from our photographer for two to three months and I haven’t convinced any of my friends or family to send me their snapshots yet. (Truth be told, I imagine they had something else going on this weekend and, you know, it’s only been 4 days…but seriously, family, please send snapshots!)
So, because we aren’t going to share any bits of the wedding day, allow me to tell you about the day before when I had an absolute break down. You knew that was coming somewhere, right? You didn’t? Oh, don’t feel too bad, it came as quite a shock to me too.
Remember how I told you I had a rash on my torso that was getting worse due to stress? And remember how my dermatologist gave me a mild steroid to make it go away? Well, it hasn’t gone away, but it didn’t spread up my chest and neck, so when those wedding photos do surface they won’t have blotchy red spots splashing out from the neckline of my dress. The bad news was that in the subsequent 60-some-odd hours after I started taking that pill I got less than 5 hours of sleep. Five hours of sleep, three days, and stress up the wazoo does not a happy girl make. At noon on Thursday (day prior to wedding day, if you recall), a few of my coworkers kicked me out of the office and told me to please go home and take a nap.
Instead, I went to the salon to get my toes painted and texted my favorite aunt–who happens to live next door to the salon and be my same shoe size–to see if she had some rainboots that would go with an emerald green dress. The forecast was calling for slush, snow, sleet and all sorts of nasty weather. My Aunt Mouse, my Dad’s youngest sister, was at the salon in a jiffy with a pair of adorable boots. When she walked in she took one look at me and asked me what on earth was going on. I really did not look very well. I started sobbing. Sobbing! Uncontrollably sobbing. Apparently, negative sleep, a super stressful week of work and finishing up pre-wedding details (with a list still go finalize that afternoon)..(plus there may have been a little bit of PMS in there somewhere), will reduce me to a very leaky pile of dark undereye circles and nail polish residue.
Luckily, Mouse is the most incredible woman I know. Within minutes she had taken over. She insisted the girls at the salon give me a full pedicure and manicure, with that fancy new shellac stuff so they were instantly dry. She had her assistant call and iron out the last details with one of my vendors (note: when the Alt Design Summit, the Outdoor Retailer’s convention, and Sundance Film Festival are all in one town the same weekend, things like getting an exact time, or even a normal range of linen delivery is next to impossible under the best of circumstances, and under my circumstances–see: melt down in above paragraph–it was absolutely impossible). Then she insisted her assistant tackle the rest of my To Do list. She went to Costco, she finalized everything, she arranged the last minute details…she saved me. I obviously was in no condition to talk to anyone rationally and logically about anything. And, as if that wasn’t amazing enough, Mouse booked me an appointment with her personal massage therapist for later that afternoon. She fixed everything. By the time she was done I had exactly three things left to do. Finish my mani/pedi, get a massage, and pick up J-Mo from the airport. Three things! Knocked down from somewhere in the 10-12 range!
I cannot imagine what kind of mess I would have been in if Mouse had not staged an intervention. I mean, Mouse saved me. She swooped in with cute rainboots and left me with my fingers and toes well attended; she and her assistant cleared their day and fixed and finished and finalized my To Do list. They forced me to take a break and focus on what was really important, and surprising to me, the important thing was not running to Costco to get an entire shopping cart full of citrus fruit.
Friday morning, Wedding Day, I went to get my hair done, set-up the final bits for dinner after the ceremony (including doing something very Pinterest-worthy with that shopping cart full of citrus fruit), went to fill up two balloons that were so ginormous they would not even fit into my vehicle, took a quick bath, changed into my wedding dress, and went to the church.
And then, my friends, I walked down the aisle and recited some of the most lovely vows to the most wonderful man I’ve ever met. I cried, but this time instead of sobs of sleep-deprived overwhelmed frustration, they were tears of joy and happiness and overwhelming love for him and for us.
***** ***** *****
In writing this post it has occurred to me that while I can be controlling and sometimes even a bit on the freaky side of controlling, I think my biggest problem is that I assume I am Wonder Woman. I assume I can do anything I set my mind to do, and that I can do it on my own, and without asking anyone for help, and in a timely manner. So, some of those may be true, but all together? Yeah, probably not 100% true all the time. I can do anything I set my mind to do, but I more often than not need to ask for help to accomplish it in a timely manner. Unfortunately, it took me breaking down in front of a pedicurist the day before my wedding and someone–a true Wonder Woman–swooping in to save me in order for me to realize it. Fortunately, I realized it. And fortunately, I have some people around me that can help me remember that realization.
***** ***** *****
Dear Mouse, I know you don’t read this blog, and I’ve already written a lengthy and tear-filled thank you note with far more heart-felt sentiment, but I wanted to thank you, publicly, for showing me that it’s okay to ask for help; it’s okay not to be perfect; and it’s perfectly normal for someone to love you, despite and perhaps because of your imperfections. Love always, heidi
***** ***** *****
*No, her name isn’t Mouse, but it’s been her nickname as long as I can remember, and in our family it is a very sincere term of affection and endearment.
Filed under: With this ring I thee wed
- On Monday my sister and I spent the afternoon doing crafty things. We wired buttons for boutonnieres for the six little boys, made fairy-ribbon wands for all the flower girls (all seven of them!), and did all the DIY stuff for the centerpieces for the family dinner. Everything turned out better than I thought it would. Consider me terribly pleased.
- See that, folks. I was crafty. Once. Don’t get used to it.
- Also? I don’t think I will ever be able to spell boutonnieres correctly on the first try. Bless you, Spell Check.
- Last week a itchy spot on my torso–one I had assumed was simply eczema from the dry, winter air–suddenly multiplied into a dozen itchy spots that were spreading up my back, around my stomach and inching towards my chest.
- A few days later they had doubled again and I was in a constant state of Itchy-Scratch.
- On Tuesday morning, after a bit of very scientific internet browsing, I called the dermatologist and told the receptionist that I was getting married on Friday and I thought I had a mild case of shingles that was starting to creep up my chest and neck and was there anyway they could see me? Apparently, as soon as you say “I think I may have shingles and I’m getting married on Friday” they insist you come in immediately.
- Good News: I don’t have shingles. Or hives. Bad News: The doc doesn’t rightly know what this rash is, but he says the stress I’m under currently is definitely making it worse.
- The doc prescribed a mild dose of steroids to force my immune system to calm down and stop thinking that this week was the week to make me all red and blotchy. He also warned me that the most common side effects of Prednisone are insomnia, a feeling of extreme hunger, water retention, and a puffy face.
- Wedding Day photos…water retention…puffy face. Awesome.
- Good News: Three days of steroids and the rash has gone down considerably and, I hope, will mostly be covered with my dress. Good News: So far, I haven’t noticed any water retention or puffiness in my face. Good News: Apparently I lose my appetite completely on Prednisone, I have had to force myself to eat (which, if you know me, is really really strange). Bad News: Insomnia? Yep, full force. I slept three hours last night and two the night before and even without any caffeine I am perky as can be. It’s irritating.
- The last details are coming together quite nicely for the ceremony tomorrow. I picked up my shoes and my short-sleeved, to-my-knee dress fits perfectly.
- Like most of the rest of the country, January here in Utah has been much more like April than January; mild temperatures and no snow. Except for we are currently under a winter-weather storm advisory that lasts through tomorrow. In the last 12 hours the ski resorts have received over a foot of snow and are expecting two more feet today. It has been rainy, sleety, and slushy here in the city.
- My shoes are satin peep-toe. My dress is short sleeved. The plans for outdoor pictures have been thrown all sorts of wrenchy.
- Good News: I found an umbrella that has stripes in both orange and green (our colors) and I have two choices of rain boots, one stripey, on flowery. So, maybe the outdoor pictures will be a bit different than we thought, but I think it will be fine. (Thank you to Erika and my Aunt Mouse for supplying said umbrella and flowery rainboots.)
- As for everything else? It will be fine. Just fine. Because at the end of the day it’s just J-Mo and I.
I’m getting married on Friday. Things are mostly ready and completed, and the things that aren’t I have chosen not to worry about. I have enough stress in my life without freaking out over centerpieces or the perfect color of emerald green. I meant to write a deep, satisfying ballad about the things I have loved so much about being single, and why I will miss them. But instead, I present you with this spider’s web of relationships that I have tried to navigate. I made this over a year ago, I finally feel like the connections, friendships and break-ups are old enough that I can publish this here without causing a firestorm, I have combined a few people into one box on one or two occasions, so if you find yourself on this map and are offended, it’s probably because your box is half-full of someone else’s drama. All the names are completely fictitious, and resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. However, the relationships as indicated by the various colored lines and circles are accurate. Go ahead and click on that. I double-dog dare you. (No, it’s not a virus, it’s just a detailed map of CraZyTown!)
Things to note:
-
My best friend “Justin” is still roommates with my ex-sort-of-boyfriend “Bradley” and was also roommates with a previous ex-boyfriend “Bryce*.” (*My roommate just married Bryce, but the REAL Bryce, not this made-up one that I created months and months ago to help document my frustrations with dating from a very
smallconnected pool.) - I found one of my best friends, “Arietta” after we both dated, and subsequently broke up with, the same jerk, “Dave”.
- I dated “Joseph”, who was the ex-boyfriend of “Felicity”, my dear friend “Grace’s” roommate. When I started dating Joseph, Felicity immediately stopped talking to me, even though she broke up with him. Multiple times. (Grace and I became friends after Bradley (see above) broke both our hearts.)
- Yes, there are always some awkward, tense moments at parties, and yes, we all still attend many of the same parties.
This is a very small part of a large circle of friends and acquaintances and friends-of-friends, but you can rest assured that any small sample of that circle will bring you the same kind of tangled mess of relationships, both then, and perhaps even more so now. I am sure married life will bring it’s own set of tangled, messy problems. And perhaps in another year I will draw another road map to illustrate, but for now I am thrilled to be leaving behind all the drama but still maintaining the dear friendships I have made (as denoted by the purple BFF circles, obviously.)
Right after Thanksgiving J-Mo and I went to Bryce Canyon National Park in Southern Utah, and I don’t think I really mentioned it here, let alone wrote about it properly. And by “write” I mean “share some of the most gorgeous pictures I’ve ever taken.” J-Mo and I were only in Bryce for two days, and one of those days I had absolutely debilitating cramps, which meant me curling up in the fetal position at the lovely Stone Canyon Inn (highly recommended!) and taking a lengthy nap. Even with that damper, J-Mo and I managed to see a lot of the canyon, driving the entire length and wandering around on a few short hikes. If you go, I highly recommend the following: stay at Stone Canyon in Tropic, UT, you won’t be disappointed and Dixie, the owner, will make you a fantastic breakfast and give you her best tips on hiking. Don’t shy away from Clarke’s restaurant, also in Tropic. Yes, it is crowded between a grocery store and a motel/hotel of the same name, but the prices are low and the food is surprisingly good. Do NOT eat at Ruby’s Inn, the biggest hotel in Bryce Canyon. Their buffet is basically a pared-down version of Sizzler, and perhaps even less tasty (if Sizzler could ever be defined as “tasty”). Don’t do it. You’re welcome.
I only took about 500 pictures, I’ve picked my favorites to post here.
Scenic Byway 12, my first view of the gorgeous red rock near Bryce and a teensy little taste of what was in store for me the next two days.
Scenic Byway 12 goes through several man-made arches, carved right out of the sandstone. J-Mo took a dozen photos of me here, mostly because I was absolutely freezing–despite the sunny skies–and making all sorts of really awesome faces.
The entrance of Bryce Canyon, goodness, I adore that handsome boy there on the right. (I promise I’ll stop gushing about him–at least for a moment–and gush about the gorgeous scenery instead.)
Our first stop was Sunset Point, one of the more famous lookouts in the park. We arrived at about 4:30 and the sun was dropping in the west, illuminating the hoodoo’s and flooding the canyon in the most gorgeous light. I haven’t edited any of these photos except for a crop here and there, Bryce Canyon is one of those places where photos absolutely cannot do the place justice.
Sunset Point, after hiking west from the parking lot to the canyon rim.
The sun was so low that it actually shone through the red rock, making it look like it was on fire. I took a hundred photos (ok, maybe twenty) trying to capture the effect, I doubt I did, but hey, I tried. For you. Because I’m a good blogger like that. (This is the part where you ignore/forget that I am almost two months late in posting said photos.)
Sigh. I want to go back already. Although, perhaps when it’s not quite so cold, the wind at the canyon rim is absolutely murder.
The rock formations in Bryce Canyon are called hoodoos (or fairy chimneys, which I think is a much better name). They only appear in a few places in the world, and nowhere else in North America. They are the weathered remnants of large finns of sandstone, and in Bryce they are these towering formations with hundreds of alleys and trails weaving in and out of them. Many of the trails were closed for the winter, and many of the trails are never open because it is easy to get lost in such a place where everything looks the same and you cannot see any way out.
Awwwww.
Before the sun was completely gone, J-Mo and I wanted to see Inspiration Point, so off we went, deeper into the canyon.
Inspiration point was absolutely breathtaking. The wind was bitter cold at this point, but J-Mo and I hiked around a little anyway.
There I am, probably the happiest I’ve ever been in my whole life, smiling at my sweetheart. (I know! I said I wouldn’t gush about him anymore! I lied, okay!?)
Getting fancy with the waning light, the more I look at this pic the more I love it.
This pic has already been posted here, but it’s one of my favorites of us and definitely the best from the weekend.
I have been living in my current apartment for more than five years and for more than five years I have wondered what the crap to do with this particular space. I am upstairs in my building and next to my front door is this strange bump-out thing that makes room for the stairs. (Did you get that? Yeah, me neither, it’s this funky half-wall thing that is convenient for plopping mail and heavy groceries while extracting my keys from the deadbolt and juggling my purse.)
It took quite a while for me to learn to appreciate this weirdo half-wall thing, but now I don’t mind it so much and wanted to make it something with a little more pizzazz.
See? It’s pretty blah. Right? I recently hung the large photo on the left, a favorite that I took myself last spring, so I knew that was going to stay. And I also needed the following things in my dream-entry-with-a-weirdo-half-wall-thingy: mirror, lamp, bowl for keys (as clearly labeled above, thank you, Microsoft paint).
Last weekend I had an epiphany, I figured out what I wanted (without ANY help from Pinterest, thankyouverymuch. No one else on Pinterest has a weird-o half-wall thingy in their entry to deal with.) only, there was very little chance that my little idea was something I could find at Target or IKEA or anywhere else. So, instead, I scribbled a picture for J-Mo, and adding a lot of waving my hands around, and asked him if he could help. He measured some things, sketched for a minute, and off we went to Home Depot. Approximately 6 hours later my shelfy thing was built, painted in the colors I’d picked out–two coats!–and ready for me to accessorize. (AND, he built another shelfy thing for my kitchen so the cereal and the waffle maker can occupy the same shelf.)
Six. Hours.
I know! I’m keeping him.
I bought three cream-colored bins ($4-ish dollars each) to house things like gloves and–well, for now it’s just gloves–and everything else I already had in my apartment; books, larger lamp, mirror, and two really awesome antique Chinese figureheads that my sister gave me a couple of years ago for my birthday.
The outside is Valspar Brown Velvet and the inside is Valspar Homestead Resort Olive. I only bought half-pints of each (about $3.00 a piece) and I only used about half of each one. Win! I’m not sure if I’m done with this, but I think this will last me for another five years at least.
What do you think? Huge improvement, right? Are there any spots in your house that you hate and can’t figure out what to do with? (You maybe shouldn’t ask me, it took me five years to come up with bins and boxes.)
Ten years ago today I met J-Mo.
What?
Yep, that’s right. Ten. Granted, I was 18 and he was married to someone else and the only thing that was exchanged was an introduction. But yes, 10 years ago I met the love of my life at my best friend’s wedding; I was a bridesmaid and he was the best man. We definitely were not suited for each other then (hello teenager + married man), and without the experiences we’ve both had for the last ten years there isn’t any way we would be suited for each other now. That being said, I am so grateful that we ended up where we did.
I wish I could go back and warn 18-year-old me that the next decade would really really suck in many ways, but that it would turn out alright in the end. Before I arrived at the church for the ceremony, I had just spent several hours on the phone with my brother who was in the ragey part of a divorce. My former sister-in-law had done some truly heinous things and my brother was pretty anti-The Whole World But Love In Particular. This conversation was the first I’d heard of his divorce, I don’t even think he’d told our parents yet, and I remember being surprised, but my world was not particularly rocked. I remember thinking “People get married, and then they get divorced. It’s just how things go.” I remember walking down the aisle of the wedding of my best friend, Sara, wondering what on earth she was getting herself in to. Wondering why she was choosing to make this particular step. My parents had split a decade earlier, and now my only married sibling was drowning as his own marriage imploded. It seemed, that marriage may not be the greatest idea.
I am pleased to report that my dear friends who married 10 years ago are still happily married with three adorable kids. They have figured out not only how to make a marriage work, but how to make it work well. I am sure it was not without a lot of growing pains and heartache, but in many ways they are a shiny example to me of making a commitment and sticking with it, no matter what. I am also pleased to report that my own views on marriage have changed drastically in the last ten years. I went from seriously doubting the whole idea of marriage, to making the leap myself, to filing for a divorce, to hating men all over again, and in the last few years to coming to the conclusion that with the right man, marriage would be wonderful.
Dear Sara and Jared, Happy Anniversary. I certainly hope the next 10 years are even more happy and amazing than the last. Love, heidikins. (Also, thank you for hooking a girl up with such a hottie. You both clearly have excellent taste in friends.)
In ten days, I will stand up in front of family and friends and marry that hottie, he is the love of my life. The last two weeks have been particularly full of wedding arrangements, and the more things I cross off that To-Do list, the more I am looking forward to the morning after when we have the rest of our lives stretched out before us full of adventure and promise and love and happiness. Yes, and heartache and hard times and the rest that comes with making a life with someone. But I cannot wait to get past the details about shoes and bowties and program printing and just focus on my relationship with this amazing, caring, sweet, wonderful man.
You and me, my love, just you and me.
In last year’s recap post I said “2010 was a rough year for me, as I know it was for many people. I hope 2011 is better.” I am happy to report that 2011 was amazing. Perhaps even more than amazing. I think it is safe to say that 2011 has been the best year of my life. I hope it is the beginning of an up-and-up trend, come on, 2012, don’t let me down!
I turned 28 this year, I don’t actually remember what I did on my birthday. But, the next day–which happens to be Valentine’s Day–was my second date with J-Mo. I told him he could come see me if it was just another Monday and not Valentine’s Day. He brought me cupcakes that he’d made himself. With sprinkles. Swoon.
While I did not go on any international vacations (yep, move that New Year’s Resolution into the “fail” column), I did visit three new states, four new National Parks (and five more return visits) and a gaggle of other places. I went to Phoenix for the annual booksale, I walked all over San Francisco, hiked Angel’s Landing in Zion National Park, wandered through The Devil’s Garden in Arches National Park. I rode on the back of a Harley through the desert. I went to Montana for the first (and second, and third) time and fell in-love with the gorgeous mountains and laid-back living. I visited Yellowstone National Park for the very first time and pretended I was a real photographer. I visited (and feel I truly “discovered”) White Pine County, Nevada. I went to see an old roommate in Portland and knocked Oregon off my list of states to see. Before I started my final semester, J-Mo and I went on another motorcycle trip to Glacier National Park in Montana (trip #2!) and rode the amazing Going-to-the-Sun Road. This fall I went to Philadelphia, the birthplace of America, and the famous Mushroom Festival in Kennett Square, PA. On this trip I also made a quick detour through Delaware, making my states visited 36 of 50 (only 14 more to go!). Add two weekend trips to Phoenix to see family (no photos/no blog post), a road trip of beautiful scenery around Southern Utah, another weekend with J-Mo in Zion National Park to see the fall leaves, and then the most wonderful weekend imaginable in Bryce Canyon National Park. A trip back to Montana for Christmas rounded out my travels for 2011.
I read 18 books this year, which is not the 25 I was hoping for and certainly nowhere near the 60 I read last year, but I am happy with my number. I had a lot of other stuff to fill my brain with (ahem, 8 university classes and the required readings and assignments that go with them). The best book I read in 2011 was Half the Sky. It is not an easy read, nor is it fluffy, but it changed me forever. Check out my post detailing all the books I read this year for extra details.
I did not suffer any major illness, but I have the somewhat freakish, undiagnosed business going on in my chest. Hopefully 2012 will bring some resolution and peace on that front. I am still dealing with back/spine issues from the aftermath of my car accident almost four years ago. I have a sneaky suspicion my spine and hips just won’t ever be the same.
I fell in love with a boy, and I fell hard. J-Mo and I started dating in the early months of 2010 and got engaged in November. Our low-key, non-traditional wedding celebration will be this January. He is, hands down, the best match I could have ever imagined for myself. I have even started seeking out country music (I know, I know) because it reminds me of him. It’s a darn good thing J-Mo has decent taste in country music, no twangy bangoy business about missing your truck and your dog.)
I did not lose any weight, I didn’t even try.
My little sister gave birth to my new niece in November (can’t wait to meet her!) and several other friends and extended family members had new babies of their own, some in better circumstances than others.
I did not attend a funeral, although my grandfather is getting more and more frail. I don’t know if I will be so lucky for 2012.
I did not contribute significantly to my savings account, but I did pay off my student loan and my car. In February I tried a financial experiment to try and curb extraneous spending, not sure if I can feasibly do it again this year, but I wouldn’t mind trying.
Year after year, I find my largest expenses are for travel. I don’t operate on a massive consumption budget. I bought more shoes and more books in 2011 than I did in 2010, which isn’t saying much as I was employed for the entirety of 2011 and only half of 2010. Unemployment means no new shoes or new books. Except for a few “fill in the gap” items J-Mo and I will need, and hopefully a new mattress, I see 2012 going about the same way.
I wish I had done more pleasure reading (as in, not a textbook, don’t be gross), more cooking, and more exercising. I wish I’d spent less time on Facebook. Although, Mr. Zuckerburg’s recent changes have mostly eliminated my desire for it altogether. I’m kind of over social media, I’ve removed Twitter and Facebook from my phone, cleaned up my contact lists and locked down my security and privacy settings. Perhaps I’m paranoid, or perhaps I’ve just had enough.
The TV shows I managed to keep up with are Bones and Project Runway (although I’m kind of over Brennan being pregnant, I think it was a lame-sauce plot point. Angela was pregnant all last year and now Brennan is pregnant…I just want them to be smart and solve crimes, not talk about puking and breast feeding and stuff like that. I have enough blogs to cover that, thank you). I have recently fallen head-over-heels for Big Bang Theory. I think part of my brain assumes that listening to all those geeks and nerds talk about physics and…stuff…will somehow increase my IQ. So far it just keeps me up far later than I should be watching the DVR’d episodes back-to-back-to-back.
My biggest achievement this year was finally finishing my University degree, a Bachelor of Science in Economics. It has been a long, hard road, and I am absolutely THRILLED to be done with it. I honestly don’t really think it has sunk in quite yet, give me another few weeks.
My biggest failure…I’ve failed at a lot of things this year, but at this point I am over it. I’m sure I have let people down, hurt others unintentionally (and perhaps even intentionally), I’ve probably told less than the complete truth and purposefully omitted certain facts to spare myself some embarrassment. I’ve eaten too much chocolate and spent more money than I could have, but I don’t think of myself as a failure. I guess I failed at going on 2 international vacations, and I did not hike to the top of Mt. Timpanogos, I didn’t even try. So both of those things will go back on my resolutions list, however, “failure” seems like a pretty harsh label for something like that.
This year I think I finally realized how great my Dad is, growing up we had a strained relationship at best, but for the last ten years or so it has gotten better and better, and this year, in particular, I think it has really blossomed. He has been my biggest support, loudest cheerleader, and a really great friend. He’s like a trump card I keep in my back pocket, he has taken care of me for a long time and while I may not need him as much as I have in the past, I like knowing that he’s always going to be there. This is really new for me, and I’m surprised at how choked up I’m getting while writing this paragraph. You may have had your parent as a BFF when you were tiny, but for me I didn’t learn to really see or appreciate my Dad until well into my twenties. I’m glad it turned out this way, actually.
This year I was also surprised and embarrassed by the appalling behavior of others, and of one person in particular (who, I should note, is in no way related to me). I won’t go into much detail here, but her behavior is strikingly similar to something I’ve seen before. In fact, I had a front-row seat to this kind of ridiculous, immature behavior for quite a while. In the long run, things didn’t turn out so great the first time, and I really don’t see how it could possibly turn out the way she thinks it will this time. MB: you’re doing it wrong. Knock it off already before you screw yourself over for the next 10 (or 40) years. Or don’t, no skin off my nose. (Yes, I am being deliberately vague.)
Dates that stick out to me from 2011 are November 5, the day I got engaged to my sweetheart; November 23, the day I took a spontaneous, adventurous plunge; December 15, the day I discovered I passed all my classes and am officially a college graduate! (Wow, it’s been a good 2 months!)
My New Year’s Resolutions for 2010 were kind of hit and miss; some I kept, some I didn’t. New ones will be made–per tradition–for Chinese New Year in a few weeks.
Life lessons for 2011:
1. It all works out in the end. If it hasn’t worked out, it isn’t the end.
2. Good things come to those who wait.
3. Always say “yes” to an adventure.
In 2010 I read 60 books, this year I knew I wouldn’t have nearly that many, but I hoped to get in 25. I only read 18 but I still consider that a success, sure, I could spend the next two days cramming my face full of short, fluffy novels to hit my goal of 25, but I have found, of late, that I don’t particularly care for short, fluffy novels. I read more and more non-fiction and am loving the change of pace. I am getting a lot pickier about what I read, I don’t want to bother if it is somehow going to be subpar.
These are listed starting with the ones I liked the best and petering out to the ones I didn’t necessarily love, listed alphabetically by rating because heaven knows I would never be able to get this posted today if I tried to rank them from most favorite to least.
5-STAR READS:
Fifth Avenue, 5 A.M., Sam Wasson. This book is about the making of the movie Breakfast at Tiffany’s, which has been my go-to feel-good movie for over a decade. I love Audrey Hepburn, I love the whole premise of Tiffany’s, and I absolutely loved reading about the behind-the-scenes moments and even the production issues of trying to get Truman Capote’s book turned into a film. This isn’t necessarily ground-breaking stuff, but I would definitely read it again.
Half the Sky, Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn. By far the best book I read in 2011, Half the Sky is about the plight of women around the world, more specifically in the underdeveloped world where women are still very much seen as commodities and treated as such. (The title comes from an old Chinese proverb that says “Women hold up half the sky.”) I was shocked at the stories, the statistics, and the lack of real options to help women. This book changed how I think, it changed what I want to do with my life. It is not a happy book, not by any means, but it is important. Read it.
I am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced, Nujood Ali with Delphine Minoui. Another book about the oppression against women, this one set in the Yemen. This is the true story of young Nujood who was forced to marry a much older man when she was 9 years old, the man raped her, beat her and basically treated her like most men in his country treat their wives. Nujood fought back, she walked into the Supreme Court of Yemen and asked for a divorce. At age 10. Without a father/brother/uncle/husband to speak for her. This story was picked up by the media and a young female Yemeni lawyer decided to fight with Nujood, this is their story.
Superfreakanomics, Steven D. Levitt, Stephen J. Dubner. Yes, I am an economics nerd. If you read Freakanomics you know how this book goes, Levitt and Dubner pick apart statistics to relate two seemingly unrelated things. They are related by either factual stats, or by both adhering to the same economic processes. Entertaining, and a justification that economics majors can have a sense of humor.
4-STAR READS:
Supernaturally, Kiersten White. The second in the Paranormalcy series and written by my childhood friend. Oh, and it also made the New York Times Bestseller list the week it came out, no biggie. (Translation: It’s a BIG FREAKING BIGGIE!) I don’t usually read YA books, but I have very much enjoyed following Evie’s story and can’t wait for the third installation, set to be published this summer.
The Chosen, Chaim Potok. I don’t know much about the Jewish religion or the Jewish culture (there aren’t a lot of Jews here in Salt Lake City, although we do have one very lovely synagogue.) I loved the way Potok writes, I loved the details about pre- and post-war life for the Jews in America (WWII), and I loved the writing style and voice of the two young men, Daniel and Rueven. I liked this book so much I ordered another by Potok, I can’t wait to start it as well.
The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin. I know this has made the rounds in blogdom and book clubs everywhere, I feel like I was a bit late to the Happiness Project train, and I really think I need to read it again, this time with a notebook and a pen, scribbling notes in the margins and making my own plans to reboot.
The Help, Kathryn Stockett. This is the first audio book I have ever listened to, and it took me over 6 months to finish it. I enjoyed the book, and I loved the character voices on the audio recording, but I don’t know how much I love the idea of listening to a book instead of reading it. Jury is still out on that, I’ll keep you updated. I haven’t seen the movie yet, nor do I feel I need to, but I did love the message that words and books can change things for the better (or worse, I get that too). I loved that all it takes are a few people standing up for something important to change the way a town thinks.
The Male Brain, Louann Brizendine. I read The Female Brain last fall and scribbled in the margins, highlighted entire paragraphs, and felt that Brizendine had sat me down and told me all the reasons that I am the way that I am, and that I was okay this way. I cried a lot. I had a lot of “A ha!” moments. I wished I had been able to read it again the next day. I didn’t have the same emotional reaction to The Male Brain, but I was fascinated by the insights and chemical processes that happen as a young boy matures into a man and then becomes a father.
Under the Banner of Heaven, Jon Krakauer. This is the most disturbing book I have ever read, and probably not for the reasons that you may think. Yes, it is about the founding of my home state and the beginnings of the Mormon church. No, it is not particularly flattering account on either of those events. That’s not why it was disturbing. I really need to write an entire post on this because I am not exaggerating when I say that I could not sleep for the two days it took me to finish this book, and for weeks afterward I would wake up with nightmares.
Undress Me in the Temple of Heaven, Susan Jane Gilman. Gilman and a college friend spent 6 weeks backpacking across China when it very first opened it’s borders to western tourists. This was pre-Tienanmen Square and China was very much soaked in drowning under communist rule. Her insights and thoughts and experiences on the country I love were fascinating, and disheartening, and engaging. And even though China was no block party back in 1986, and Gilman’s writing reflects that, I still cannot wait to visit and explore.
3-STAR READS:
A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole. I have heard a hundred times from friends, bloggers, review boards, and a half-dozen other sources that A Confederacy of Dunces is the most hilarious, amazing book ever written. Respectfully, I total disagree. I did appreciate Toole’s use of language, I love a book where I need to look up words in the dictionary ever few pages, but I hated his main character. Ignatius J. Reilly mostly just pissed me off. It took me months to finish this book, and I kept waiting for it to get better. Nope, it didn’t. I give it 3 stars (instead of 1 or 2) based on the vocabulary alone.
Das Kapital, Karl Marx. I plowed through 1,000 pages of Das Kapital, text and annotations for my Marxist Economics class. Did I enjoy it? No. Did I understand it? I aced my tests, so yes, I did. Do I agree with Marx? Um, no. In theory he has some interesting ideas and I think that many businesses owners would do themselves a favor by reading it, but do I think all his ideas (or even most of them) work in practical application? No. They don’t. The basic tenet of Marxism is that any business owner who makes a profit is exploiting his employees. Even if those employees are making a good, livable wage. Even if they are being paid $100,000 dollars a year. Or $200,000. The idea is that if there is any profit whatsoever the capitalist bastard CEO should burn at the stake. Ok, I may have embelllished the last part of that sentence, but the sentiment is still correct. I know capitalism has it’s problems, but I don’t see how the technological, medical, scientific and anthropological advances of today’s society could ever have been achieved if an entrepreneur didn’t figure out how to make those advances to turn a profit. Boo, Marx.
DIY U, Anya Kamenetz. Kamanentz theory is that traditional higher education is on it’s way out and the only way to education the workforce is to completely reboot the way we learn, the way institutions grant degrees, and the entire education process. She makes some excellent points, and in some respects I agree with her. But I also think there is more to college than churning out degrees, or even devouring knowledge. There is a work ethic, an expansion of the mind, and an exposure to new ideas that are not generated by a social media platform that also focuses on celebrity gossip. Perhaps I’m a snob. Or perhaps my position of working in higher education is showing through a bit and coloring my opinions. Again, Kamanentz has some good points, but about halfway through I decided that I just couldn’t agree with her call for a complete and total overhaul of the post-secondary education system.
Madame Bovary, Gustav Flaubert. Meh. Not awesome. Not even great, really. Again, points (or in this case, an extra star) for vocabulary and sentence structure that I both enjoyed and appreciated, but the story is pretty tedious and the character of Madame Bovary herself is quite wretched. Sure, there are a lot of people like her, slumming/sleeping around for social position and power, but I just am not interested in that sort of thing and her emotional turmoil over her loveless marriage doesn’t really move me. At all.
History of Love, Nicole Krauss. Recommended by a friend this was a quick read and one that I enjoyed. I liked–although sometime was a bit lost by–the weaving story that crossed generations and continents and through various individuals. Honestly, I remember liking the book, but I don’t remember much more about it than that.
2-STAR READS:
Woman, Child for Sale, Gilbert King. I wanted to love this book, I wanted it to move me and change me the way several of the other books I’ve read on the topic of the degradation of women have…and this book failed. It started out strong enough, but quickly devolved into a mess of terrible stories (they are supposed to be terrible, there is nothing light or happy or fluffy about women being sold or kidnapped into sexual slavery) but the author was not a capable enough writer to do them any justice whatsoever. Perhaps my expectations were too high, but after reading Half the Sky this book seems like a footnote in a boring newsletter. Not awesome, please skip.
For the rest of my reading, ranked by star and sorted by year, click here.
